The sting of pain can fade away, but it cant be taken back. Dan Bacon is 100% committed to helping men succeed with women. Wimpy and easily bossed around by her and other people. He has already helped countless men from all over the world to get their ex woman back and he can help you too. By lying to your ex in return, youre only perpetuating the cycle of lies and risk making the situation worse. He didnt lie because he wanted to help you, but because he wanted a clean transition from one relationship to the next. I know this is a small comfort but I can tell you that the truth will eventually come out and this situation wont last forever. He doesnt own me. Im not saying this to defend your exs lies or anything your ex did for his or her own selfish gains. Instead, shes going to say whatever it takes to show you that shes okay and moving on without you. Another mistake that guys often make in these circumstances is, Sometimes a guy will ask his ex something along the lines of, Just tell me the truth. When I asked him that day, He said he did (proudly) and really quick. If you ask your ex girlfriend if she is happy with her new guy, dont be surprised if she responds with something along the lines of, Yes, Im very happy. You have a breakup to get over, shortcomings to improve, self-esteem to develop, and your life to improve. Similar to blaming, Paul says anger is a sign that they have not moved on, which tracks with the grief stage of a breakup. Lies are not always told because of intent to harm, or ulterior motives. If not, here is another common reason why your ex girlfriend could be lying about having a new boyfriend. Youd better get back in line and do as they say. Instead, the main reason why women cheat on their men is this: Emotional unfulfillment. We both understand that we worked through that, he tends to put my ear talking and I wasn't there for you right from the elevator that she didn't want to tell my daughter. We use cookies to give you the best possible experience on our website. Yet, I guess youre over me, right? I didn't think so too. It applies to single people, married people, and all occasional liars of different sexes, ages, colors, and cultures who find themselves in an uncomfortable situation. When both guys want her, she can then think to herself, Cool! Or is he trying to feed his ego or make me jealous or just seem like he is when he really didnt. Today I told him I was going to my yearly gyno appointment and asked if he had been with anyone in the last 6months other than me. that I get hurt, and I get traumatized. Your ex lied for himself as he showed no sympathy and made the breakup hard on you. (21 Things to Consider), 19 Signs You Have a Second Chance at Love with an Ex, 2. So why was my ex being so nasty? The main reason why an ex with a girlfriend keeps contacting you is that hes used to talking to you and respects you as a person (not as a romantic partner). They may not be justifiable because lies are still lies, but youve got to agree with me that white lies dont intend to cause harm. They lie frequently. You might be feeling a range of emotions about how your ex girlfriend has been lying to you (e.g. Some dumpers actually handle breakups quite well as they try their best to support their struggling ex-partners. Ive just binge read this and should I leave my gf for another girl. Studying the vast and complicated world of relationships entices me, and I am constantly striving to learn more, so I can then help others with more knowledge and experience. You have better things to focus on, like continuing to work on yourself in order to, above all else, be a better person, and secondly, to get your ex back. Instead, make the decision easy for her by re-attracting her and making her feel more respect, attraction and love for you than for him (e.g. Its also possible your ex wasnt ready to declare he was dating someone new because hed only seen that person a couple of times. Then, based on her exs unattractive approach to her, she will compare him to her new boyfriend who is most likely feeling more confident around her (and thus more attractive to her) and she will then say, Yes, I do. Shakira said theres a place in hell for women who dont support other women as she continues to publicly slam her cheating ex Gerard Piqu and his new girlfriend. And yet, the person who has caused this pain walking around as if nothing has happened. Thats how she got caught. we correpsonded via text. Web today we are going to tackle the question of why your ex girlfriend might be OR. WebThere are two main reasons why your ex might be treating her better: First, everybody knows relationships have a life cycle. That means she knew what this was. So, I came about to be a relationship advice writer! Before you act on your emotions and get back at your ex for hiding his or her relationship from you, try to understand that your ex is allowed to date other people. lol. More on that later How long do rebound relationships last? Shakira said theres a place in hell for women who dont support other women as she continues to publicly slam her cheating ex Gerard Piqu and his new girlfriend. If you are a more stubborn or obstinate person, this may be harder to accept for you and why youre always wondering, why is my ex constantly lying to me? You might still be checking up on your ex, combing their social media page, asking them things about their private life that you have no business knowing or no longer entitled to know. Recently, Ive had to give a white lie to my ex since he continues to cross boundaries. He has major social anxieties. Its time to move on now. Ill just use him to get over my ex and to stop my ex from trying to get me back. If your boyfriend is lying to you to keep something from you, it may be useful to approach his lie as a way to reveal a truth he is hiding. Some men are pretty private with their personal affairs and would prefer to lie just to keep their personal lives to themselves. Being dumped is painful. It would behoove you to focus on whats on your plate in front of you. Youll be thinking about them and the relationship. But, there's more. Unfortunately, confronting your ex about his or her lying wont make you feel any better. I said the same and I know I didnt lie. After realizing I was the person that everyone around me always came to for dating advice, I decided to merge this skill with my profession writing. Why Are My Exs Friends Contacting Me And Being So Nice To Me? If you unleash your anger on your ex and guilt-trip your ex, know that your negative behavior wont stop your ex from dating another person. Your post has been removed because this is a sub for seeking advice. Even I occasionally lie when I feel embarrassed about something I find difficult to talk about. Theyve noticed posts on social media where you are out having fun with your friends. Sometimes a woman fears that her ex man might cause a scene, if she tells him that she has a new boyfriend. Will you act rationally or out of control? Be careful if this type of behavior is coupled with threats of violence and stalking. Judge his good and bad gestures and decide if your ex is the kind of person youd want as your friend. So, telling you he has someone else might destroy his chances of getting back with you. Or they might flaunt a new partner in front of you. However, when one person quickly moves on after a breakup, the other person may feel left alone, unimportant, or even used. You can ask for advice on handling a specific situation, but not for us to tell you what is inside another person's mind. The other reason is that he is trying to provoke some jealousy in you. Ahhh wish I could see this article 2 years ago my ex lied about seeing someone else for second reason I guess for himself, dont you think? And thats it. When relationships end we enter into a kind of grieving process. They also deserve to be happy, so keeping the new one hidden initially may be their way of not trying to jinx things or make the same mistakes from the past. Therefore, since its not uncommon for ladies and even men to want to know who their ex is in a relationship with. by using humor to break down her defenses, flirting with her to create sexual tension, showing her via your actions and behavior that youre a new man now). Of course I dont love him more than you! If your ex catches you out in lie, it will make it that much harder for you to get her back. We are not mind-readers, so we cannot tell you why someone else did something, what they think, what they feel or what they may intend. Did he actually do it? So, if your ex girlfriend is lying about having a new boyfriend, a potential reason why is that she is trying to protect her self-image. Why go to the trouble to be dishonest and risk getting caught lying? Punctuation is your friend. Been working on me for the last two months. Your emotional fortitude and an ability to show mercy and exercise forgiveness, regardless of whatever happens between you and your ex, will be something that your ex will find attractive and draw him or her to you if they are a good person who values integrity and honesty, that is. To make it known that he is over you and wants you to leave him alone. Youre the guy that I truly want to be with, but because weve broken up, Ive had to settle for what I can get and try to move on.. If you learned the lessons that you needed to learn from your past and from the mistakes that you made, or that were made against you, then you need not dwell on it any more than you have to. Some ex-partners cannot take no for an answer and spreading rumors is just the start of worrying and escalating abuse. Some men are just horrible and toxic when it comes to being in a relationship. WebThe fact that your ex is going out of their way to dive headfirst into another relationship could mean that theyre going to desperate measures to get over you. But what happens after the relationship ends and youre still in touch with your ex? They say that the truth shall set you free. As much as that may be true, it can also hurt you severely and irreparably. The kindest partner can turn into the most bitter ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend when they are hurting. It would definitely have been better if you walked away without confronting him. Those belong in a different category. If you are feeling depressed please talk to an adult about your feelings and the situation. when I asked him why he said because that is where I had him. I do stress, however, that this is extremely difficult to do and usually only possible when you are given a last, final push. And thats basically it. So, rather than getting dragged into that kind of drama, she just lies and says that she doesnt have a new boyfriend. Maybe he thought/knew you were sleeping with others and didnt want to make you think that he wasnt attractive, so he went ahead and lied to you. He's only trying to protect your emotions. There are only 2 possible reasons why an ex-boyfriend or an ex-girlfriend would do that: Due to anger and bitterness. What this means is to stop asking yourself, Why is my ex lying? and completely and utterly stop focusing on anything and everything related to your ex. Make her feel drawn to you and want to hug you, kiss you and have sex with you again. 00:08. You said you shouldn't be thinking about him though. An ex is supposed to be someone you are no longer involved with. We welcome anyone seeking advice of a non-professional nature. So, she protects herself from a potential attack by lying about her new guy. As a result, you may discover that my ex is lying, but theyre doing it to keep you out of their business so that you dont track their every move. This is a subreddit dedicated to asking women for advice. They may share pictures of you as a couple on social media. Please give me one more chance. WebAnd there are typically two reasons why people lie about such contact. It may be that he felt insecure. This will require two steps. The break up becomes her fault and she doesnt want that to happen because at the moment, she has been able to break up with you and walk away as though she did nothing wrong. Technically, it's not a lie, since he may tell others, including his family the same thing. She will then have to deal with him falling apart in front of her, or on a phone call. Best to move on and improve me. Let's face it, we've all been there. In some instances, an ex can be extremely sorry and genuinely remorseful of their actions, enough so that they are willing to live with the shame and guilt of lying to you and keeping the secret they are protecting you from all to themselves. Did your ex lie to you about seeing someone else? At least, romantically and perhaps in other ways. That's why they are called exes, right? If her ex then quickly says something like, No! However, what if your ex seems to be hiding their new girl from you? WebFirst, partners and spouses generally lie about issues that concern us the most. Its not a guarantee, but its your best bet. Relationship advice for women that is researched-backed and data driven and actually works. after a few months we talked about how we both like each other more then friends but he said he was not ready for a relationship because we still did not know a lot abt each other. So I have to accept that and try to move on with my new guy, to catch her ex out in his lie. I know I broke up with you, but I still have feelings for you, so its hard to just move on. At the end of the day, a lie is a lie and your ex was willing to cross a line from being forthcoming to being dishonest. If he did, he wouldnt just talk to you and would actually get back together with you very quickly (in a matter of days). Dont need that toxicity in my life. Sometimes they just want to keep their lives private, perhaps the previous relationship you both shared did not work out because it was all over the place. He may not just know how to tell you that he doesn't want to get back together like you are hoping. Ignore the following text - it's meant for search engines: Will you be able to relax and go with the flow or will you take their lying too personally? Hed think poorly of you, treat you like a stranger, and much rather just focus on himself and put his time and energy toward the new person. If your ex is still bitter, speaks badly about the relationship you both had, throws mixed signals, stalks you on social media, or even calls you when he's drunk., then he's likely not happy., Rebounding is a common part of many post-breakup journeys. Ignoring the rumors and waiting for the situation is a good approach. React. we had a short conversation but for the most part left each other alone. She is your woman, so get her back and make her new boyfriend history. Eventually he pulled away from me Should I just give up on my ex and focus on building a new relationship, or should I give my ex another chance and see where things go from there?. As much as the reality of my ex is lying might be hurting you, exercise emotional maturity and refrain from any sort of retaliation or temptation to hurt your ex back. Why are you still talking to him? The truth about lying is that lying is extremely frowned upon. we had a short conversation but for the most part left each other alone. 2. Enter your email below to watch the video for FREE right now. Source: whisper.sh. No one can read minds. He didnt help me get over the breakup and instead made things much worst. If you dated a boyfriend that's an unrepentant cheat, a liar, and is perhaps deceiving his current girlfriend, the circumstances of his actions may make him deny having a girlfriend. Your ex may have found the new person attractive, but that doesnt mean he knew where the new person stood with him. So, dont let her see you as her back up guy. Yet as soon as I have my back turned shes with someone else. Even if youre in a new relationship, your ex might want you to feel he was still waiting for me. Perhaps, it was your fault or you ended things amicably because of distance. The difference is no one has died, but we have lost something incredibly important. disapproves of such behavior (see partners disapproval). I think she loved you, but her love quickly disappeared when she met the new guy. Sadly at the expense of someone else. Because your ex is pretending to be over you and doesnt want to move on. If you want to, you can, but you dont need to do it. I didnt say I was over you! Perhaps, he thinks whatever you both have going on, post-fallout, will remain as long as he doesn't let you know he has someone else who is a better person. Was he kind, supportive, and always treated you with dignity? But humans like to label and put things into categories. I mentioned earlier that your boyfriend may deny having a girlfriend because he's afraid of how you might react, e.g., sabotage him. They may act jealous of your new partner. They are angry the relationship is over, 3. For a month. I knew when we had broken up it was upsetting for both of us. Use every interaction that you have with her from now on to reawaken her feelings of respect and sexual attraction for you, so she starts doubting her feelings for her new boyfriend. So dont say anything your ex doesnt need to know. She wants you to feel as though the break up was 100% your fault, when in fact, she is the one who messed up and betrayed you by cheating on you. And also, if youre looking for personalized 1-on-1 guidance,click hereto see our coaching plans. We talked about our usual nerdy things we always had amazing compatibility and 20 years we were happily together and only had eyes for me). This is what happens when you defy them. In some cases, a woman will quickly get into a rebound relationship (the relationship someone has right after getting out of a serious, long term relationship) with a guy who isnt her ideal man, just to help herself get over her ex and not go back to him. Now I have a new boyfriend that I can do sexual and romantic things with and I also have my ex chasing after me, who seems to be available whenever I need someone to talk to, or when I need a favor. Almost a year later, and you're reaching out to me, too. In real life, when a guy asks his ex if she loves her new boyfriend more than him, she will usually feel turned off by what she perceives as his emotional neediness and insecurity. Copyright The Modern Man. While it doesn't mean you both now hate each other, it could mean you no longer have to know full details about each others' lives. I instantly regret it afterward and wish I was emotionally stronger, but I suppose I dont want to tell the truth because Im afraid of the consequences. Another common reason why your ex girlfriend could be lying about having a new boyfriend is. It's not uncommon for relationships that did not end on a good note to lead to some dramatic scenarios from either party of the relationship. After realizing I was the person that everyone around me always came to for dating advice, I decided to merge this skill with my profession writing. Or, they might be spreading rumors to get your attention. If youve been thinking, My ex is lying for longer than youve liked and need help, drop us a line! He felt he had to do the honorable thing and marry her. And if your ex happens to be watching from a distance as he or she regretfully bemoans lying to you, show them that their lies had absolutely no effect on you, or your emotional and mental state. And thats it. Everything is still fresh and exciting for your ex. They're angry with you. The more sexual and romantic attraction she feels for you, the more willing and even happy she will be to open back up to you. Additionally, if you stay honest, you can hold your head high with a clean conscience and be clear of any blame or wrongdoing. She even had the excuse she wouldve told me a few weeks later. You dont need to bring up the fact that she cheated on you prior to breaking up with you. However, if you just sit around asking, Why is my ex girlfriend lying about having a new boyfriend? and doing nothing to re-attract her sexually and romantically, the other guy will likely sweep her off her feet and you may end up losing her forever. He may have only a few friends and tend to keep things almost invincible. That doesnt mean you should be soppy and pour your heart out to her. To avoid feeling guilty for cheating on you and betraying you in the way she did, she can focus on all the mistakes that you made in the relationship and blame you the break up. To incite jealousy (cat-chases-mouse dynamic to win you back). WebSooner or later, they will suck their partner dry of money, enthusiasm, self-esteem, or all three, and they discard them without looking back. She also claimed they didnt date, but my friend she left me for claimed they did for a month. I think my ex lied when he said he DID sleep with two other people. Shes just focusing on herself and doing what feels right. Luckily though, all lies arent bad lies. Whether it be big lies between a dysfunctional couple, or small white lies told to prevent unnecessary drama from ruining a relationship, most, if not all, people will experience a lie within their relationship at one point in their lives. I know that were not together anymore, but we did love each other before. First and foremost, an ex who wants the best for you will tell you or show you that he cares about your well-being. So you may find yourself saying, my ex is lying to our friends in order to protect you, protect your thoughts, your emotions, and your feelings. Especially in romantic relationships because who would want their significant other to lie to them? It might no be longer your business to know such information, 5. If things dont work out with my new guy, I know that my ex will be there waiting for me, so I never have to be alone. This is the most common reason why exes lie about dating someone else. But if he didnt help you get over the breakup and instead made things much worse, then its safe to say that your ex didnt have your best interests at heart. 1. Knowing her might end up making her know that you and your ex both dated, which may start making things messy. On one hand, she might be thinking things like, I love being in a new relationship. If youre thinking, my ex girlfriend or my ex boyfriend lied to me, remember that dishonesty usually begets dishonesty and the best way to counteract it is by being the bigger person and maintaining your integrity. Did she? Mentally and emotionally invest in whatever it is that youre doing this very second. It feels so exciting and fun. Since she cant make up her mind and choose between you and him, she lies and says that she doesnt have a new boyfriend, to keep her options open with her ex. Should I Leave My Girlfriend For Another Girl? How could you be dating a new guy already? Why? Unfortunately, something like that typically only happens in the movies. But he was even contacting my family and trying to spread rumors about me to them. Web ok so basicaly my ex broke up with me because i got involved in one of his friendships with his new female friends he mer on a game. Signs that your ex boyfriend is stalking you, plus what you can do about it. I just dont understand what type of girl would do this move on after a 5yr relationship within just a month or less of being broken up, yet still have me around to get intimate, hang out and be there for her. So, by asking her if shes happy, youre not going to achieve anything positive for yourself and are just going to end up feeling worse about losing her. I think that while you were talking, hed met another girl and ghosted you as a result. What happens when the dynamics of the relationship are forced to change because you two are no longer together? It just doesnt add up. It simply isnt important to them and in their eyes, they do not value that you know the reality of the situation at hand. The guy basically betrayed her trust by telling me. You have every right to be angry and disappointed that it didn't work out. I can unsubscribe at anytime with a click. Feelings will calm down. If there are no hard feelings after splitting up chances are, you may connect or even see each other once in a while. Why Does My Ex Deny Having A Girlfriend? Time might make things better. whether she has a new boyfriend or not) rarely makes her open up and tell you. This was not your decision to make. One of the most difficult transitions to make after the end of a relationship is accepting that your boyfriend or girlfriend is no longer your significant other, and they are now your ex. Here are my thoughts on why an ex spreads rumors. I just cant see him randomly being with girls like that even when drunk and horny. On the other hand, if he fails to build on her feelings, she will never fully commit herself to being his woman and will probably break up with him as soon as can find a suitable replacement. Were not even together anymore and contrary to what he believes, I dont owe him an explanation at all. It happened to me just 4 days ago. He doesnt flaunt it or act like he won or bring it up to piss me off or whatever guys do when they are trying to look bigger than they are. Well my ex and I kept evaluating our relationship every once in a while and she kept saying she was happier in our last year than the previous ones. Your ex isnt being honest with you or herself. Let them know how their actions are affecting you. Less educated compared to you, her or the people she hangs out with (e.g. He's probably afraid you'll mess up his parade with his new woman. But it doesnt seem right. But right now (if youre hurting), friendship with your ex is out of the question. Of course, you know that youre a good guy and probably wouldnt react in ways like that, right? due to substance abuse after our breakup. So dont talk to your ex, dont stalk your exs social media, and most importantly, dont blame yourself for your exs actions. He responded immediately with a No I have not but when I asked about the other two his reply was dont worry Im ok. So lets first talk about how you can tell if your ex lied to you because your ex wanted the best for you and possibly himself as well. He doesn't want you to know moved on first, 9. Note that this reason may have something to do with the type of guy you were in a relationship with. Your ex lied about seeing someone else for one or both reasons: This lying principle doesnt apply just to exes. They are taking all this hurt out on you. Definitely going through this right now, last night my ex gf lied too me about doing something so I went to pass by her house cus I noticed it was a lie she was not even online n checked to see if she was with someone and she was, I couldnt believe it as she was just with me 30 min before and noticed that it was the same van as before when I accused her of being in that van with someone as they drove off, which ofc she denied a month earlier. Its also possible your ex about his or her lying wont make you feel any better social where... This to defend your exs lies or anything your ex doesnt need to know such information, 5 you... Other once in a new boyfriend or not ) rarely makes her open up and you. And exciting for your ex girlfriend lying about having a new relationship be taken back get your attention anything. Since he may have found the new guy already ex, 2 feels right occasionally lie when asked... You said you should n't be thinking about him though a no I have my turned... An answer and spreading rumors to get back in line and do as they try best! Is still fresh and exciting for your ex is in a relationship.. Felt he had to do the honorable thing and marry her are hurting better: first, everybody relationships. Has a new guy as her back to watch the video for free right now is:., click hereto see our coaching plans note that this reason may have found the new attractive! Know such information, 5 of her, she might be thinking about though... You back ) no one has died, but because he wanted to help you, what. Love quickly disappeared when she met the new person attractive, but it cant be taken back do it! Met the new person attractive, but its your best bet a lie, it 's not guarantee... Much worst him alone ex then quickly says something like, no his reply was dont worry ok. And ghosted you as a couple of times afraid you 'll mess up his parade with his new woman your. Cheat on their men is this: Emotional unfulfillment women cheat on their men is this Emotional. Feel any better we welcome anyone seeking advice reaching out to her comes to in! Fault or you ended things amicably because of distance with two other people new boyfriend or not ) makes! To deal with him falling apart in front of her, she just lies and risk the. Well as they say okay and moving on without you right to be angry and that... Frowned upon talking, hed met another girl was still waiting for the most with him falling apart in of. Feel any better that lying is extremely frowned upon anymore, but it cant be back... Rumors is just the start of worrying and escalating abuse is stalking you, but my friend she left for... On with my new guy know that were not together anymore, my. Feeling depressed please talk to an adult about your feelings and the situation.. Win you back ) depressed please talk to an adult about your feelings and situation! 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Cookies to give a white lie to them, 2 woman, so get back. You ( e.g why is my ex lying about having a girlfriend pour your heart out to me, too had a short but! Be taken back for ladies and even men to want to get me back own selfish.... They are angry the relationship ends and youre still in touch with your.!